A portrait printed in black ink on grey paper wears a dizzy expression, with an overlapping layer of the face showing double features. Red and blue embroidery threads outlining the misaligned face adds to the double illusion.
A portrait printed in various green inks vomits a mound of embroidered green grass onto the ground.
An etched portrait of a person looking forlornly while their hand holds their head up in the air. It is printed in black in on tan paper, with the fingernails painted red and red embroidery thread hanging in two long loops from their eyes.
A portrait printed in a green on grey paper. The person winks at the viewer, head cocked to the side. Except for a circle around their face, the portrait is solid green with gold embroidered threads radiating from the exposed face.
An etching of a head printed in black and blue on white paper. The face is obscured by solid ink except for a small circle around their nose and mouth. Abstract blue stitched are embroidered in the background.
An etching of a face gazing downward, printed in black on tan paper. Black embroidery threads hang down from their eyes like tears, and a circle on the top of their head reveals a starry, night sky.
An etching of a face in profile, head resting on the ground and closed eyes facing upward. Printed in black ink on grey paper, a mess of black threads are embroidered throughout the hair and red French knots create a sphere above the face.
An etching of profile portrait printed in black ink on grey paper. The person has dark hair up in a bun and is tilting forward to stare listlessly downward. Below their eye, from a second, mirrored eye, a long red thread hangs down to a mess of embro
An etched portrait in black ink on tan paper of a bald person lifting their gaze to the sky. Thick, dark bands streak down their eyes like tears, joining together at the base of the neck. Three loops of black thread hand down below.
An etched 3/4 portrait of a person printed in sepia on cream paper looking down across their shoulder with eyes mostly closed. Instead of hair, a mess of embroidery threads create a dense nest on their head, with two small eggs resting inside.
An etched portrait of an upside down face, eyes closed and mouth open in an exasperated scream. Printed in blue ink on white paper, hair composed of numerous blue threads hangs down to the bottom of the paper.
An etched portrait of a face with closed eyes and dark hair hanging down across the forehead. Printed in black on cream paper, red embroidery thread is held across the mouth with a hand and hangs down around its wrist.
An etched 3/4 portrait of a person staring wearily at the viewer. Printed in blue ink on white paper, a tangle of threads is etched into the figure’s head and hanging down around the neck. A strand of blue embroidery floss hangs from one eye, looping
An etched portrait of the back of a person’s bald head. Printed in blue on white paper, the head is textured in a smattering of scratches. A myriad of overlapping embroidered stitches in a blue-white gradient cover the head and spread out above it.
An etched portrait of a face split down the middle from the top. The left half is printed in lilac and the right in pink on cream paper. Lilac and pink threads weave together where the faces split apart.
An etching of 15 portraits arranged in a triangular mound printed in greens on cream paper. Their expressions represent a range of chronic illness symptoms, from pain to nausea. Numerous strands of black thread connect the faces together.
An etched portrait of a face with closed eyes and a hand over the mouth printed in black ink on white paper. Two halves of a face split down the middle are printed in red to either side, with rays of red thread connecting the halves to the central fa
An etching of four portraits arranged in a grid. Each has a different expression, ranging from rage to pensiveness and are printed in a myriad of blue tones on grey paper.
An etching of 15 portraits arranged in a grid printed in rainbow colors on cream paper. Their expressions represent a range of chronic illness symptoms, from pain to nausea. Each face is embellished with embroidery in matching colors.
An etching of four portraits arranged in a grid. Each has a different expression, ranging from dizziness to nauseated. Three are printed in black ink and one in red on cream paper.
An etched portrait of a face with double features printed in green on cream paper. Two halves of a face split down the middle are printed in light green to either side, with rays of green threads connecting the halves to the central face.
An etching of three portraits arranged in a line. Each has a different expression, ranging from fatigue to pain and are printed in a myriad of blue tones on white paper. Two strands of embroidery floss string the faces together from their eyes.

All in Your Head | 2023

A solo exhibition at Hecho a Mano in Santa Fe, NM

“It’s all in your head” is a line that echoes through the experiences of Sick and Disabled folks navigating society and the medical system. It’s a phrase that Eliza Lutz has often heard from doctors during their own experience with chronic illness. They acknowledge the harm it does, as well as its inherent conflict:
 “While it’s important to push back on the idea that Sick and Disabled folks are ‘faking’ or exaggerating their experiences as is implied by the ‘it’s all in your head’ line, we must do so without further marginalizing mental illness,” Lutz says. “To flatly reject this line just further affirms it—I’d rather embrace, reclaim, and subvert it.”


 That’s what Lutz seeks to do in their upcoming show at Hecho a Mano. Rather than taking the idea at face value, Lutz asks their audience to respond with a, “Yes, and?” 
 Their work poses a series of questions: Why do we aim to divorce the mind from the body? Why do we downplay the mental toll that comes with dealing with physical symptoms like pain, nausea, dizziness, or fatigue, or from the social isolation and institutional discrimination that comes with it? Why do we treat physical illness as fundamentally different from mental illness, when enabling this divide is what makes a statement like “it’s all in your head” so harmful and dismissive? Why do we continue to view mental illness as less valid? 


 All in Your Head is an extension of past series inspired by Lutz’s lived experience of chronic illness and disability, “in all its in/visibility, fluidity and expansiveness,” Lutz says. Their Able and First Impressions series combine monoprinting techniques with embossing and embroidery. All in Your Head is a series of embroidered intaglio self-portraits that illustrate “how symptoms of chronic illness are felt, processed, and ever-living within the mind, not just the body.” 


 Lutz sees their chosen media as aligned with this theme, too. They are a longtime screen-printer, and recently began to explore other printmaking techniques while attending UNM, beginning in 2021. “I love printmaking because it is so exacting, despite this being very at odds with chronic illness,” Lutz says. “Where printmaking is all about being in control, I often feel very out of control with my body. Rather than finding this friction point a kind of restriction, I enjoy letting it guide my printing process — making it slower, less precise, and imperfect just like me. But there are also many parallels between printmaking and navigating the world with a disability that make this a perfect medium to explore these themes — in both you prepare for everything constantly, but things still never go quite as planned. Both require you to become a master adapter.”


 Lutz’s printing process involves using cut and shaped copper plates, which leaves them with a lot of accumulated scraps. Rather than letting these scraps go to waste, they had the idea to create portraits in miniature. It also played into the show’s theme: “These scraps would typically be considered defective and unusable, as they are already scraped, oddly sized, and imperfect. Bringing my self-portrait out of these cast-off pieces felt like yet another way to push against the precision and perfection of printmaking — and the able-world at large — to reflect the chronically ill experience.” 


 Lutz’s monoprinting with etched plates creates prints that can’t be exactly replicated, which is by design. “Printmaking, not unlike the day-to-day of chronic illness symptoms, is all about repetition, but I want my work to embody the fluidity of this experience and how the same symptom or emotion is never felt the same exact way twice. Embroidering my pieces is an extension of this, as it allows me to pinpoint a small sliver of a feeling, knowing it can never be perfectly repeated, even if it is replicated over and over. Embroidery also enables me to express what is not visible, connecting the places where internal experience and external perception meet.”


 Lutz wants their audience to understand that “it is all in your head, and all in my head, and that is just fine.” And while they’ve heard the line from doctors time and time again, it's something that comes even more frequently from within. “This internalized ableism is deeply rooted and very hard to unlearn,” they say. “This work is part of my ongoing unlearning process, and I invite the audience to join me in the difficult work of being kinder to ourselves.”

For more about the show visit: hechoamano.org/show/eliza-lutz-all-in-your-head

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FIRST IMPRESSIONS